My Biggest Regret
I was was the new Beauty and The Beast film with Emma Watson and Dan Stevens and I think it may slightly beat the original Disney film (although that will still have a place in y heart). As this is my favourite Disney princess film I had to match up my drawing of Belle with her prince- The Beast! I wanted to draw the beast as a challenge for myself as at first I was really struggling to get the outline. I have always loved the character and I enjoy watching Belle challenge him with new ideas and a different view on the world. It is my favourite Disney movie and so how can you have Belle without The Beast?
As I was watching the film whilst Dan Stevens was singing Evermore, I realised how he must regret treating Belle at the beginning and finally setting her free-for her to choose to come back to her- as he was falling in love with her. It got me thinking about the one and only regret that I have in my life.
Why I Drew The Beast
My Biggest Regret
Regrets are weird things aren’t they? Everyone always has the cliché quote plastered all over their Instagram to “never have ANY regrets” and “you’ll regret what you DON’T do rather than what you DO”. But how do you know that you will regret something when your older? When in that precise moment you think that’s what you wanna do.
I was always a late developer so I completely missed my teenage years and started being the grumpy, bored of everything in my late teens early twenties because ya know, that’s life and it didn’t want me being moody when everyone else was, course not, that would’ve been too easy! Will I regret these days of procrastination and not carrying on with the hobbies I loved because I was bored of them?
I find it hard to trust people and put these walls up whenever new people try to enter my life (you’ll need to bring a mallet-seriously- these walls won’t be easy to break down). It’s always been drilled into me that trust isn’t an entitlement someone has, they have to earn it. Will I regret that I haven’t given people a proper chance because these walls are just too high?
How are you supposed to know if a decision you make in one precise moment, you’d regret for the rest of your life?
I think so far, the ONLY real thing that I regret is giving up on my violin lessons. At the time, I was worrying too much about what people thought and how “uncool” it was to play the violin. I hate that I listened to all the peer pressure and quit something that I had worked so hard at, to get to Grade 5.
I used to practice everyday and got the opportunity to learn some pretty amazing tunes like the Pirates of the Caribbean and the Harry Potter theme tunes. I loved the variety of music that I was able to play and it didn’t just have to be the classical music that I started with. Once you’ve learnt the basics you can transfer that knowledge onto other types of music and I bought ABBA and musical songs to keep my interest up so I would keep playing.
However, there was a time where I did get bored of it as well thanks to teenager hormones and other interests coming to the surface (like boys) which didn’t help my motivation to keep playing the violin. I wanted to hang out with my friends and felt that the violin was putting strain on my social life because I was missing out on days spent with my friends after school because I was going to an orchestra every Wednesday.
It’s only now that I realise how stupid that was, I have the rest of my life for socialising but not the rest of my life to have the time to learn these new skills. Once life gets busy with jobs and responsibilities these leisure past times become few to none. At least, I have realised this early and as soon as I have a steady income again, it may be the time to start up lessons again as even though you may regret something, it’s not too late to pick it back up again.
So instead of trying to live life without no regrets, it’s more about reflecting on your life so far and if you do feel like you have a regret it’s never too late to change or start something new that you wished you had done earlier. I think all these things are life lessons that need to be learnt, and sometimes what you feel in the moment might not be the same as you feel further down the line.
Obviously, I have regretted situations I’ve been in too. Maybe I could’ve handled a situation differently, but without these moments you wouldn’t know how to react if that situation happened again. You learn more by mistakes than you do by sailing through everything (although that would be easier) and nobodies that perfect!
About The Drawing
A couple of years ago I tried drawing The Beast- or I turned into one… what I’m trying to get at is, that frustration took over and I eventually just tore up my piece of paper and threw it in the bin, with the “it’s too hard” mentality and left it at that.
A month ago I tried The Beast again, same thing happened. Attempted the outline 5 times, all of which got rubbed out and I finally gave up and hid my pencil back in its case like I never even took it out.
A couple of weeks ago, I opened my sketchbook and my first outline sketch was exactly how I wanted it to be. How does that even happen? 🤷🏼♀️ You don’t need to answer that, if I don’t understand me then I wouldn’t expect you to.
Everyone always asks me how I learned to draw like that. My go to answer is normally “practice” but really I think it’s down to luck, having a “good day”.
So the moral of the story is:
I don’t really have one or never give up (you decide what you wanna take away from this.